So Anna asked me to be on call in case she went into labor while her parents and in-laws were unavailable, and they needed someone to come stay at the house with Jack while she and Pete went to the hospital. Of course, I said yes!
The moment of truth occurred last night a little after 10pm. Anna called me twice, and I didn't hear my phone ring both times (of course, since I had been sleeping with my ringer on all night and had my phone out on dates so as NOT to miss a call the past week) as I was walking out of a bar in Uptown where I watched the Vikings-Packers game. I got her third call as I was heading to the parking ramp. I said I was on my way, hung up, and immediately freaked out. I ran to my car and tore down the ramp, remembering on level 2 that I had to pay at the little station in the lobby so parked illegally, jumped out and found no pay station on level 2. So I ran down the stairs to level 1, paid my fine ($10.50 for 2.5 hours on a Thursday!), ran back up the stairs to my car. Got to the exit part of the ramp and found the stupid thing allowed you to pay there. Grrr.
Jumped onto Lagoon and proceeded to hit every single freaking red light from Lake Calhoun, past Mary's old place, all the way through Excelsior & Grand area up to highway 100. Dang, it took me like 20 minutes since she called just to get that far. So I had time to make up! Flooring it up to about 85mph, I tore down 100 and onto 62. Where I promptly got pulled over by cop. F*CK! I have my license and insurance and window down and am practically hanging out the car window offering it to the cop as they walk up. In a frenzied voice I'm telling them sorry I know I was speeding, my friend went into labor, and I'm trying to get there to say with her 2 year old so she can go to the hospital, and her labor was only 2 hours last time, and I was already 30 minutes past when she called, and did she need to see the text on my phone to prove I wasn't making it up, and can she take a picture of my license and mail me a speeding ticket, and do they only do policy escorts for pregnant people in the movies? I'm lucky she didn't take me in for being cracked out and completely insane. She ran my license, saw I was normally a law abiding citizen, said she was letting me go with a warning cause she's a girl and knows what it's like, and to slow down up ahead because there was another speed trap (no mention of the police escort). I said thank you about a million times and zipped out of there.
45 minutes after the water breaking call, I pull into Anna's driveway and run wild eyed into the house hoping she isn't pushing on the kitchen floor. Anna and Pete were of course totally calm and relaxed, I apologized profusely for sucking at being there, told them to go have a healthy baby, and the second they walked out the door burst into tears. After reminding myself I wasn't going into labor, that Anna was not going to give birth on the side of highway, and feeling lucky that I didn't get a speeding ticket, I tossed and turned fretfully in bed all night.
I don't know if I was more upset at being rushed and getting pulled over and worrying I wasn't going to make it in time, or disappointed in myself that I was such a complete and utter train wreck in an emergency.
The most important part is the labor was a false alarm. Anna and Pete were home around 2:30am, and that little baby is hanging out cooking for a little while longer. While I so want to promise to be there for them or any of my friends, after my pathetic performance last night, I don't know if anyone should ever look to me during an emergency.
Tips on how to pull it together and be a better human are welcome and appreciated.
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