Saturday, January 2, 2016

Welcome 2016!

Happy New Year, friends!  I want you to know I rang in the new year by making bad choices and drinking like I was 23 instead of 33.  January 1st started out a bit rough, but after vomiting 3 times, and eating some McDonald's french fries I felt almost human.  Aren't you glad you read this blog? Where else can you get endless stories about drinking, puking, bad sex, and endless lists?  No where!  Finding a void in the market place and fulfilling it is quintessential American patriotism and capitalism.  When do I gobs of money for bringing this to the world?  That might be a good goal for 2016,  to figure out how all these bloggers make money writing their nonsense.  I'm already envisioning my top ad sponsors to be Excedrin, Trojan condoms, Total Wine, Netflix, and someone who makes cheap yoga pants.

Special request for an update on where I ended up with my 2015 goals/resolutions.

  • Save $X for retirement  Nailed it.  Is it cheating to not tell you how much it is? How about 10% of my income, plus I max out a Roth IRA every year.  It's also kind of lame because I don't do anything other than not change my withdrawal amount on paycheck.  Still, it has to be done, and if taking credit for something that I put no energy into isn't my style, what is?  Letter Grade: A+

  • Abbott Lane projects: remodel upstairs bathrooms, new washer & dryer, redo fireplace  Bathrooms were done, and I did get the new washer dryer.  Fireplace is on hold as I save up for kitchen and main floor remodel.  It was tough to break that project into smaller pieces.  See 2016 goals for more info.  Letter Grade: B+

  • Pay Dad for Abbot Lane work and pay off Citi cart for Abbot renovation expenses  Done.  A+

  • Sell 3 houses  I managed to sell 5 houses this year.  A+

  • Complete CPCU 530 Business Law Passed.  Barely.  I'm giving myself a B- on this because even though I passed, I waited until pretty much the last minute to take it (December 2nd), the worst time of year for work and other personal things I had going on, I did not study enough, and it was very stressful.  

  • Complete 15 hours RE continuing education  Check.  A.  No plus here because the classes are kinda pathetic.

  • Complete X hours for insurance license continuing education  My CPCU 530 exam counted for this CE requirement.  I may still have to take an ethics class, but I've been too lazy to double check the requirements, so either an A or a D.  TBD.

  • Lose 6 pounds (currently at 138 lbs)  OMG, I am 4 pounds over where I started.  I give myself a Z letter grade.  And don't even try the positive spin of "it's muscle, muscle weighs more than fat".  Trust me it ain't muscle.  The muffin top does NOT lie!  

  • Get to work by 8:45am with goal of 8:30am (been coming in 9am-9:30am and that is not ok)  Hahahaha.  I think I made it in before 9am a couple times in 2015, so we'll say D+.

  • Work out before work.  There is no reason I don't have time to work out in the morning if I'm not getting to work until 9am.  RFLMAO.  You can probably guess how this one went based on the last two.  I went to a 6:15am TRX class once or twice toward the end of the year, so I mean I thought about it a little.  Don't worry, I complained the whole time about how early it was, how tired I was, how hard the workout was.  I won't even dignify this with a letter grade.  

  • Prioritize fitness/health before social and fun activities.  My excuse for not working out is usually that I don't have time.  Happy hours, shopping, dinners, etc are important for maintaining relationships, but not more important than my health and self esteem about looking the way I want.  Hm, I think I did less social stuff, mostly because my friends are busier with kids and work, but I think I would be lying if I said I used all that extra down time to work out.  I definitely thought about how I should be working out while I watched 7 episodes in a row of 30 Rock.  I did join a gym and was pretty consistent at going to 3 classes a week for about two months.  Letter grade C (that's generous but I feel like I need a pick me up after bombing so hard on these last few goals).  

  • Floss regularly.  I just don't do it, but it's easy and doesn't take long.  B-.  I didn't floss regularly, but definitely more than in 2014.  Did anyone else see that article that came out that flossing doesn't really improve your mouth...anyone? 

  • Donate 3% of income to charity.  Missed this one last year and have a lot of expenses with the house, so keeping this goal same as 2014.  To aid in this process, I have also chosen the charities and the amounts I will donate which months to make the budgeting easier.  Finally, back to winning!  A on this one.  RAGOM, ASPCA, Susan G Komen, Second Harvest Heartland, Nepal EQ Relief, YMCA, BSM, MPR, Military Vets, Resource West School Supply Drive, FMSC, Hennepin County Library, and Adopt a Family all saw cash money from Micki Cloutier this year.

  • Read 15 books Pulled this one off too.  A.  I'll tell you the books and give my reco on whether I think they are a worthwhile read for you.
    • Horns: weird ass shit.  Maybe if you want something really different.
    • Wild: liked it and think it's worthwhile.
    • Absolutely True Diary of a Part Time Indian.  Loved it.  Short, easy to read.  Looking forward to reading something else by him.  Believe the author, Sherman Alexie, will be in the town in February and may try to go see him speak.
    • Less than Zero: ugh, hated it.  I didn't even finish it.  It's about nothing.  Burn this book if you see it.
    • American Pastoral: started out promising but got boring.  Read the first 100 pages and you're good.
    • This Bright River: eh, it was kind of weird, and ultimately a bit disappointing as I thought it would be a bit more dramatic/mystery novel.  There was a lot of build up in the book about this horrible thing a guy did to his wife, and then it just turned out that he ruffied her had butt sex with her while she was passed out.  I mean that is not cool, but I dunno, they built it up to be WAY worse.  
    • The Innocents: modern day re-telling of Edith Wharton's The Age of Innocence.  It wasn't my fave, but I enjoyed the story.
    • Girl on the Train: liked it and can see why it's a best seller.  Heroine is a hot, hot mess, so will make you feel good about yourself despite your flaws.
    • Luckiest Girl Alive: read this from a recommendation I saw in the daily Skimm.  Enjoyed it.  
    • Cuckoo's Calling: been wanting to read this for a long time as it's by the author of the Harry Potter series, although she published it under a male pseudonym.  Totally different than Harry Potter, not that it pretended to be similar but I was surprised at how many reviews attempted to compare them.  Liked the characters and will read the next book in the series.  Kind of had a Sherlock Holmes type feel to it.  Edgy and quick witted like the movies with Jude Law and Robert Downy Jr.
    • Paying Guests: enjoyed it at first and then it just got too long and annoying.  I don't want to give anything away, but it did have kind of a juicy situation for post WWI social norms.
    • The Martian: loved it.  Listen to it on audio book to get the best rendering if the character's sassy personality.
    • The Joy Luck Club: another "classic" novel that I don't get why it's considered a great read.  The book is stories told from different viewpoints of 4 mothers and their 4 daughters.  The individual stories were kind of interesting, but I didn't make the connection how they wove together or really get the point of the book.
    • Dark Places: this is by the same author as Gone Girl.  Some weird shit goes down in this book.  I enjoyed it.  
    • The 9th Girl: a fluffy thriller I read over Anguilla vacation and while traveling.    
  • Stay up to date on current events  I went through waves of listening to MPR in the morning on my way to work, I subscribe to the daily Skimm (although I am currently about a month behind in reading them), and I listen to MPR and Frekonomics podcasts a lot lately.  A B seems fair.

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